have any lds apostles been divorced

Death, war, financial insecurity, divorce, Church inactivity, there are many circumstances that can shake a family to its core and try each family member's testimony. WebBecause of the beliefs that (1) celestial marriage is required for exaltation, and (2) that Jesus is exalted, some leaders of the LDS Church have hypothesized that Jesus must have been married, possibly to Mary Magdalene, Mary, sister He currently serves as the Ward Mission Leader of the Annapolis Maryland Ward. One woman got an angry look on her face and exclaimed, He did not! WebA civil marriage first is God's will, and was specified as a requirement in the original Doctrine and Covenants. Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible. This weapon must be neutralized. You can seek peace in these matters by praying and, if you feel you need extra support, by counseling with your bishop. The next morning, Joe approached his father and bore his testimony, earning his father's support to serve a mission. have 45. LDS They interpret this lack of information as a species of lyingabout Joseph Smith, about other Church members polygamous past, or about the events which surrounded the cessation of Church-sanctioned plural marriage. Just as a civil marriage does not automatically translate into a temple sealing for a Mormon couple, a civil divorce does not unseal them. I should have clarified exactly what my husband meant prior to posting. I know of no specific policy that forbids a divorced and remarried man from serving in any leadership capacity. [Page 72]If missionaries, as well as other members of the Church, are given more information to gain a better understanding and firmer foundation regarding the history and doctrine of plural marriage, they might not be so uncomfortable discussing it with non-Mormons. and continued to pray that one day his father would be baptized and his family would be sealed in the temple. Not, Flunking Sainthood, July 5, 2011, accessed August 11, 2011, http://blog.beliefnet.com/flunkingsainthood/2011/07/my-polygamous-heaven-not.html. It is also important to differentiate a man who was divorced and remarried before he became a Christian from a man who was divorced and remarried after becoming a Christian. Her expression approximated that of a deer in the headlights, and she replied, Well, his wife., I finally realized that she did not want to discuss Brighams plural wives, especially if I was accompanied by non-members, so I dropped the subject.30, This experience is likely not an anomaly. E-mail correspondence between [anonymous] and Craig L. Foster, August 11, 2011. Anti-Mormons are constantly pushing and picking at members faith in order to plant seeds of doubt and to destroy members testimonies. John the Baptist was a descendant of Aaron and as such, he held the keys of the Aaronic Priesthood. I became a pariah. Then I will get a temple sealing. Copy in possession of the author. In 1998, the late LDS president Gordon B. Hinckley proclaimed, I wish to state categorically that this Church has nothing whatever to do with those practicing polygamy. So if you were born to your parents after they were sealed in the temple (born in the covenant) or were sealed to them in the temple yourself, you are still sealed to themboth of themeven after a divorce. Comments ranged from the positive to the negative and for some people, the discovery of the Churchs polygamous past was devastating. Such shock at the prospect that Joseph Smith would have practiced plural marriage reminds me of an experience I had almost thirty years ago. For example, one active Latter-day Saint in a private e-mail group opined about possible similarities between Smith and Jeffs, None of this eases the nagging feeling in the back of the brain that somehow Warren Jeffs is a 21st-century Joseph Smith.47 This same member had previously written, I can see [Page 64]how the Jeffs case really could be a problem for some. Given how central the family is in Church doctrine, divorce in the Latter-day Saint community is a sensitive and complicated issue. Ponder what kind of support you have been, are, and can be to those you know in the Church who have experienced or are experiencing a divorce. When Elder Oaks was about 11 years old, he took a small job sweeping the floor of a radio repair shop, eventually working his way to radio engineer and announcer in his late teens. The new apostles could come from general authorities of the church, or from the church membership at large. 15. Divorce can be an ugly, painful experience that leaves all involved angry, confused, and embarrassed. Most definitely not true. These details (in part) caused me to lose my testimony.40. It is not part of my testimony of the Church.49 Another respondent referred to the idea that plural marriage would extend into the eternities as nothing more than folk belief, which is very distressing, especially to women of faith, and many individuals of LDS background have left the Church over this and similar issues.50, In July 2011, Mormon author and blogger Jana Riess wrote about an e-mail she had received from a former Latter-day Saint woman who had eventually left the Church over several issues, including the persistence of polygamous theology among Mormons. Riess went on to explain, As for individual belief, Ive occasionally heard it taught from the pulpit (and Relief Societys lace-draped table) that heaven will be polygamous. 12. Regardless of who was at greater fault in your divorce, healing wont come until there is repentance and forgiveness. Now, in a world-wide Church such as the LDS Church, not all members will have the same need for or interest in information about the Churchs polygamous past. You cannot paste images directly. Unfortunately, many believe the lack of information in official Church publications about plural marriage is a form of cover-up. Even so, 12 other countries were represented, most from European countries.34, Over 47% of survey respondents heard about polygamy as a child while another 39% heard about it as teenagers, for a total of over 86% learning about plural marriage while in their childhood or youth. I was sad to see that ward members and [ministering brothers and sisters] were so far down on the list of where support comes from, he says. I know they're on there, cause i've done it before. At the 2011 FAIR Conference, Hudson gave a presentation describing plural marriage as an Abrahamic sacrifice, or an exception to Gods law rather than an eternal principle.52 Her conference presentation, titled A Reconciliation of Polygamy, was based on an earlier article of hers titled Polygamy. Hudson claimed that in the eternities we will have the privilege of living under the law, not the exception to the law.53 She further referred to the belief, which she felt was mostly held by male members of the Church, as nothing more than celestial lust.54 In her article, she also made comments regarding modern Latter-day Saint beliefs about the eternal nature of plural marriage: If cultural misinterpretations cause the women and men of the Church to mourn over polygamy, either because they mistakenly believe that God is indifferent between sacrifice and non-sacrifice and so no escape from this sacrifice will be provided by God or because they are led to believe that they are selfish and not [Page 66]righteous if they feel pain at the thought of polygamy, then these cultural interpretations are actively harming our people. The top reason for a change in calling was relocation. The time or times of such sacred education needs a little more explanation. Ok, just confirmed. Plural marriage did not start nor end abruptly. While this survey was intended only for those of a Latter-day Saint background, at least two respondents identified themselves as non-Mormons. As several respondents put it: Why do ward members seem to have such a hard time connecting with divorced members? . To find out more about how Latter-day Saints experience divorce, I surveyed more than 1,000 active members who have been divorced or are currently going through the process. Most definitely not true. Divorce disqualifies a Priesthood holder from even being a Bishop, let alone a General Authority. applepansy Copy in possession of author. In the Church, we value family relationships so much (rightly so) that many dont know how to deal with divorce because it seems incongruent with the foundation of the Church, which is the family. But sexual relations and procreation were only one aspect of plural marriage. 2023 The Interpreter Foundation. [Page 71]. 23. And not just one isolated no. Here is some of their best advice: You'll also like: 10 Things Latter-day Saint Singles Wish You Knew, You'll also like:6 Things Every Latter-day Saint with Divorced Parents Should Understand. Of his parents, Elder Cook would later say they "loved the Savior. They make up most of the adult LDS membership. So why do This holds true whether they were married civilly or in a temple. It was reported that at the time of Jeffs' death at age 92 that he may have had as many as 75 wives and 65 children; however, conflicting sources indicate that Jeffs may have been survived by 19 or 20 wives and "about 60 children," including 33 sons. WebElder Dallin H. Oaks of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles said, There are many good Church members who have been divorced and reiterated that unless a divorced Just do your best. Sex with teenage wives.48. 40. Church leaders have discouraged speculationabout future apostles. For Latter-day Saint children of divorce, questions like this can add to the sadness and uncertainty that divorce brings. By the 1950s Mormons had become thoroughly Americanized and tended to display a split opinion about polygamy. The prospect of polyandrous plural marriages seems particularly problematic. While others shared what kept them going: I wonder if I would have continued going to church if I [didnt] have children. Given the experiences that the participants had, they made recommendations to ward leaders, Stake leaders, fellow members, and ministering brothers and sisters on how to handle future divorcing members. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saintss uncomfortable relationship with its polygamous past is much like the painful interim between when the parties have gone their separate ways but are not yet allowed to completely sever their ties. Interestingly enough, 5 of the respondents were from England, with at least 3 of them identifying themselves as fundamentalist Mormons. "When she tried to find the train, the train was gone with her four children in there.". One survey respondent wrote, Inadvertently finding out the truth about polygamy/polyandry absolutely devastated me.42 Another complained about Joseph Smith shacking up with women for years and then wrote, I am glad I discovered the truth about dirty Joes polyandry. I am much happier as a saved Christian outside the vile, lying Mormon cult.43, Discovery of Joseph Smiths polyandrous marriages can be a traumatic experience. have any lds apostles been divorced Many are confronted with these issues regarding plural marriage without a firm understanding of the LDS Churchs polygamous past. I will examine examples of members expression of discomfort over a polygamous heritage and conclude with suggestions of possible pathways to reconciliation. Web38.1. Examples of some who have furthered and even built upon some of this sensational and inaccurate stereotyping are Fawn M. Brodie, No Man Knows My History: The Life of Joseph Smith (New York: Alfred A. Knopf, 1945); George D. Smith, Nauvoo Polygamy: . 13. . For more information regarding these post-Manifesto marriages, see Drew Briney, Apostles on Trial: Examining the Membership Trials of Apostles Taylor and Cowley (Salt Lake City: Hindsight Publications, 2012); B. Carmon Hardy, Solemn Covenant: The Mormon Polygamous Passage (Urbana: University of Illinois Press, 1992); and D. Michael Quinn, LDS Church Authority and New Plural Marriages, 18901904, Dialogue: A Journal of Mormon Thought 18/1 (Spring 1985): 9105. 38. Divorced male members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints are now required to obtain permission from the First Presidency before being sealed to a Stephen C. Taysom, A Uniform and Common Recollection: Joseph Smiths Legacy, Polygamy, and the Creation of Mormon Public Memory, 1852 2002, Dialogue: A Journal of Mormon Thought 35/3 (Fall 2002): 136. The Church and its defenders have begun to take steps to inoculate members against the insidious attacks of critics and enemies. Recognizing their interest in history, I decided to arrange a tour of the Beehive House to accompany the usual tour of Temple Square. This and other facts about plural marriage need to be understood by Latter-day Saints, so information and specific detail regarding the theology and practice of plural marriage need to be provided at the appropriate time and place. For the very first time, I am seeing outright no in response to will there be celestial polygamy. They did everything they could to raise us the right way" (Elder Jeffrey R. Holland, "Elder Quentin L. Cook: A Willing Heart and Mind", April 2008Ensign). John C. Bennett, The History of the Saints; or, an Expos of Joe Smith and Mormonism (Boston: Leland & Whiting, 1842). Thats just how it is.62. The shows first season was set in Utah Valley until the Utah County police began to investigate the family. Foster, Like Two Crazy Aunts in the Attic.. Though Elder David A. Bednar's father was not baptized until later in life, he was very supportive of his wife and children attending Church meetings. Throughout his childhood, Elder Bednar would ask his father several times a week why he was not baptized. In fact, some have left the Church specifically because of this issue. 30 In closed-door meetings with local leaders, the First Presidency condemned men who left their wives by using the 59. 10. Michael Brissenden, The Mormon Moment, ABC.net, October 18, 2011, accessed October 19, 2011, http://www.abc.net.au/foreign/content/2011/s3342583.htm. Enter your email to receive updates on our LDS Living content, 2022 LDS Living A Division of Deseret Book Company, How to Talk to Children About Temple Covenants After a Divorce, What (and What Not) to Say to the Recently Divorced, 10 Things Latter-day Saint Singles Wish You Knew, 6 Things Every Latter-day Saint with Divorced Parents Should Understand. Elder Quentin L. Cook said growing up he learned how to trust the Lord from his mother, Bernice Kimball Cook, and how to set and achieve goals from his father, J.Vernon Cook. Valerie Hudson, A Reconciliation of Polygamy, presentation at the 2011 FAIR Conference, notes in possession of author. But unfortunately, this would not be the last time President Uchtdorf's family would have to leave behind everything. Even if the situation is uncomfortable or you dont know how to react, love them. Surprisingly, only 4% of the respondents did not know he had plural wives. They said they had asked other Mormons about plural marriage and had been met with embarrassment, silence, and awkwardness.67 I was sorry for both them and the members who had not known how to gracefully react to honest curiosity. Not all members of the Church have been members since their childhood, and too many new converts have stumbled upon the Churchs history of plural marriage and have been shocked and even angered they were not told of it before their baptism. However, it wasn't until years after Elder Bednar's mission and after he was married that his he received an answer to the question he had been asking his father all those years when his father called him to ask, "What are you doing this Saturday? Relationships are really difficult. Questions & Answers: My parents were married in the temple, but now theyre divorced. You'll also like: What (and What Not) to Say to the Recently Divorced, Dr. Swinton agrees. Their surprise at divorce can lead to a feeling of instability. For examples of people who chose to secretly practice plural marriage while still members of the LDS Church, see Craig L. Foster, The Persistence of Plural Marriage Within Mainstream Mormonism: The Example of the Barr and Mary Musser Family, in Scattering of the Saints: Schism Within Mormonism, eds. Not surprisingly, many members have believed these unfortunate and mostly false accusations and stereotyping, in no small part because some historians have repeated and embraced them uncritically.8, Joseph Smiths involvement in so-called polyandrous marriages added to the image of him as a man with unbridled lust. MYTH: God forbids all divorce, and divorce is the unpardonable sin. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. Others believe they were released because they were now a bad example, or because local church leaders didnt want a divorced person in that role. Gains have been made since the days I observed palpable discomfort in missionaries and volunteers. 65. Ultimately, the hope for Saints who struggle emotionally and spiritually with plural marriage is that a better understanding of the history [Page 76]and doctrine of plural marriage will encourage greater faith and bring solace to the soul. Unfortunately, such an outcome is not the case for Latter-day Saints and their polygamous history. I for one will be getting a civil marriage first, not because of lack of faith or what have you but because it is what God has ordained. He has also been a columnist for 8+ years in local small papers. Meet the Apostles. Lets dive into the New Testament and see what we can learn about the efforts of the original apostles to maintain a full quorum. According to the newspaper article, the Lawrence Research poll found that 15% said Mormons definitely practice polygamy while another 31% said Mormons probably practice polygamy: a total of 46%. Feelings About Plural Marriage. Over 230 of the respondents were born in Utah or the western United States. 4. The Apostles that were Married 21. 19. "The train stopped, my mother went out and tried to get food," President Uchtdorf told KUTV. Growing up, Elder Richard G. Scott's mother was a less-active member and his father did not belong to the Church. Another example of anti-Mormon accusations of adulterous polyandry can be found at LDSFreedom.org, Polyandry & Joseph Smith, accessed October 12, 2011, http://www.ldsfreedom.org/node/7. Divine Attributes of Jesus Christ: Meek and Humble, Catching the Vision: All Missions Bring Souls to Christ, Lighting Our Childrens Path with Gospel Standards, Teaching Gospel Standards: One Familys Experience, The Proclamation on the Family: Transcending the Cultural Confusion, Josephine Booth: Sister Missionary to Scotland, Oral Family History Fades in Just Three Generations, He Taught Me the Heavenly Order of Eternity, Latter-day Saint Men and Divorce, Ensign, August 2015, 5861. Unfortunately, over time there have been a number of members of the Church who have been upset and offended about aspects of plural marriage, especially the so-called weird aspects. For more information on the Van Dusens, see Craig L. Foster, From Temple Mormon to Anti-Mormon: The Ambivalent Odyssey of Increase Van Dusen Dialogue 27/3 (1994): 27586. This may make him feel powerless and controlled by the system. Nate Oman on Jeffs, August 25, 2011. Why did he marry young teenagers, including 14-year-old Helen Mar Kimball, who had both parents and didnt want to be married?46. "I was blessed with an extraordinary mother, Elder Oaks says. . To [Page 65]be fair, in the RS lesson this declaration evoked criticism and debate of a kind not often seen in RS.51. Elder Scott's parents would later serve in the Washington DC Temple for many years, and Elder Scott served as an apostle until he passed away Septemeber 22, 2015. By addressing difficult aspects of Church history like plural marriage in their childhood and youth, eventually an understanding of the historical practice of plural marriages would be commonplace among active adult members of the Church. Just do your best. 57. Unfortunately, George D. Smiths Nauvoo Polygamy appears to not only accept the idea that Joseph Smith was sexually involved with these women because parts of the book are reminiscent in language and imagery of early anti-Mormon exposs. Their third child, a baby girl, passed away at birth and their second child, a two-year-old boy, died six weeks later following a surgery to correct a congenital heart defect. Conference Poster: The Generosity and Mercy of God, If my parents were sealed in the temple and then got divorced, which one am I sealed to? New Era, August 2015, 41. But heres a fact you need to know: children can be sealed to only two parents. All are alike unto God, and He invites all to come unto him and partake of his goodness (2 Nephi 26:33).Church leaders and members are often asked who can attend meetings of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, who can become Church members, and who can attend a Some men have said that nothing shook their testimonies like divorce. ok if you have any links or info that i can show this person i would like to see them and thanks for confirming what i thought. If you keep your covenants, your relationships in the next life will be fair and right. All content by The Interpreter Foundation, unless otherwise specified, is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License. Alternately, Todd D. Compton, in an essay in the same volume, 184232, titled, Early Marriage in the New England and Northeastern States, and in Mormon Polygamy: What Was the Norm? argues that such age gaps between marriage partners were unusual, but because his analysis relies on New England marriage patterns rather than those of the frontier, I do not believe he has rebutted the perspective offered by Foster, Keller, and Smith. This is true even if your parents temple sealing to each other is canceled. To help us understand what its like to be divorced in such a family-oriented church, I conducted a survey of 1,062 Latter-day Saints who have experienced divorce. It's true when they say that you really do find out who your real friends are when disaster strikes. 17. Hopefully these suggestions will help those who are troubled or discomforted about the Churchs legacy of plural marriage. With the comforting doctrine that we can be sealed to our loved ones for eternity, divorce is a conclusion drawn with heavy hearts. Joseph Smiths marriages to teenagers have increasingly become a stumbling block to faithful members. .I apologize. 58. Jana Riess, My Polygamous Heaven . Bill Redeker, Beer Maker Finds Polygamy Ads Sell, Good Morning America, February 8, 2011, accessed February 10, 2011, http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/story?id=126371&page=1. Elder Cook and his brother deeply respected their father and decided to talk about their father's advice. They are in violation of the civil law. For some of our youth, the shock is too traumatic for their tender testimonies. Peggy Fletcher Stack, Poll: Most Still Unsure about Mormons and Polygamy, The Salt Lake Tribune, September 12, 2011, accessed September 13, 2011, http://www.sltrib.com/sltrib/news/52568348-78/mormon-mormons-polygamy-percent.html.csp. Elder DallinH. Oaks of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles said, There are many good Church members who have been divorced and reiterated that unless a divorced member has committed serious transgressions, he or she can become eligible for a temple recommend under the same worthiness standards that apply to other members.3, Some men say that although they would never want to go through such an experience again, they have learned from it. No matter how hard the LDS Church may try to cut ties to its polygamous past, the two are irrevocably and inseparably tied to each other. I thought everyone knew we no longer practice plural marriage, so I played along with him. As one historian explained regarding the 20th-century Churchs approach to plural marriage: [Page 54]As time passed, fewer and fewer Mormons came to identify personally with polygamy. Interpreter Foundation is not owned, controlled by or affiliated with The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. At the time, Hudson suggested some Mormon men had celestial lust. She compared these men to the young Muslim suicide bombers who killed themselves and others expecting to be rewarded with 72 virgins in the hereafter. Rather than plural marriage being noticeably absent from Church publications, it should be adequately discussed. All Rights Reserved, NEW POLICY ANNOUNCED FOR DIVORCED LDS MEN. LDS After leaving the museum, they tentatively, almost apologetically, asked me about how plural marriage started and what it was like. All research and opinions provided on this site are the sole responsibility of their respective authors, and should not be interpreted as the opinions of the Board, nor as official statements of Latter-day Saint doctrine, belief or practice. We as friends, neighbors, ward members, [ministerers], family, etc., should show Christs love. E-mail correspondence, August 11, 2011. Later, Elder Cook would be called to serve as a counselor to his brother Joe, who was serving as the stake president at the time. (You didn't see President Hinckley rushing off to get married after the death of his wife Marjorie, right?). Many survey respondents noted that they felt most accepted and supported by nonmembers because they were not judgmental and there is less of a stigma around divorce in the outside world. Be patient and reach out yourself. Clement is the only Father who reports that Paul was married; many of them expressly deny it; e.g. We then have a duty to root out these cultural misinterpretations from our midst, lest they cause great spiritual mischief.55, Echoing the thought that belief in plural marriage as an eternal principle should be rooted out among Latter-day Saints were several faithful Latter-day Saints who actively discuss Church doctrine and history. : Latter-day Saint Ambivalence over Its Polygamous Past, in The Persistence of Polygamy, 88, and Lesson 31: Sealed . For more information showing Josephs Smiths marriages to teenage wives were not out of the cultural and social norm of his time, see Joseph Smith/Polygamy/Marriages to Young Women, FairMormon Answers, accessed February 22, 2014, http://en.fairmormon.org/Joseph_Smith/Polygamy/Marriages_to_young_women.
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